Whilst my online persona and book are getting more recognition, it makes me happy for a second.
Then the gloom comes in. Whilst I’d love to get out independently this gloom hugs me tight like a weighted blanket and I don’t know why and finding it really hard to break free, no matter how much tough love I get, it makes me feel like a failure because I can’t even prove them wrong. Now usually that would give me the kick I need. I just don’t know what’s stopping me being bubbly…
The first step is to see the doctor. The second is to maybe see a counsellor? I think this is the first time where I’m envious of people enjoying their 20’s! For the first time ever my disability is controlling me instead of me calling the shots and that’s tough.
All I know is I have a great support system who may be frustrated but I know who loves me, even when they are being tough.
Phew, confession over! I know I need a cuppa (maybe joining slimming world will help give some confidence??
I know one thing, less TV and less junk food and a walk once a day before my uni degree starts and I’m swamped with work!
The fact that I know my signs of slipping are good so I can find away to fix them and go back to being me.
Take care of yourselves and be patient when loved ones are being tough – they don’t like seeing you go through this.