I‘d woken up in quite a lot of pain as my sciatica kept me up through the night. I even missed my mum going to work and she always pops a head round my bedroom door to say good morning before she goes off, But seeing the weather so sunny outside I definitely wasn’t staying in, The morning seem to scream at me: “wear your yellow lemon dress” so I did. Before my social sit, I managed to read the notes for my next projectband began setting up a document ready to start typing on Friday when I have a day in. Plus swapping over to a smaller handbag I had a quick lunch of a whisper bar and some pretzels, was hoisted in my chair and we went on our way .

As we were walking up to the bus stop (we chose a long walk to the top of where I live so that we can get soaking in the vitamin D) It was a little bit windy so I felt like I gave everyone a bit of the Marilyn Monroe flash but, who cares! Whilst walking we managed to tuck it in so it wouldn’t raise up again. The first bus that came to us drove straight past us as he already had a gentleman in a wheelchair on board, he said there would be another one there in 10 minutes (this turned out to be 30 minutes man time) but he did manage to give us a free ride so I wasn’t complaining! I was struggling to reverse into the designated space for the wheelchair on the bus because some woman refused to collapse her pushchair on an account that it was a disabled buggy and yet the child was running around on the bus not needing it. So after about 70 reverse attempts I finally got in my spot.

Finally we got into town I received a lovely text from my mum saying that she was so proud that I got out today even though I was in pain and that really boosted me because I was with a carer who didn’t know Bridgend town well and I’m crap with directions so I did my special counting method so that I didn’t go into a panic attack. I could’ve punched the air with how proud I was of myself for bringing myself out of another panic attack.

Then we went in to my favourite shop, WH Smith where I bought my woman’s weekly fiction, my trashy take a break and the right kind of writing magazine that usually read (The last time I sent to carer into town to pick up magazines when I wasn’t feeling well she brought back the wrong ones) I then got my sister a birthday card.

Then we ambled up Costa where it was time for afternoon tea and Keira, my carer for the day didn’t care that we went over our allotted time as she had nowhere to be after the day with me so that meant we could relax in the sunshine and enjoy a cup of tea, people watching. She told me she had older daughters similar to my age, that she’d been divorced 11 years and her partner is in the police and that she even worked in a prison and she’s a solitude Sally like me and that she loves Zumba and walks.

ven though I’m dieting there was a lemon cake involved and after the wobbly table spilled the milkI learnt that iPhones are resistant to dairy which was a good thing. Keira even insisted on paying.

We started to make our way back to the bus as I needed to use the toilet to empty my catheter bag but I stopped in to a Thomas Cook travel agency and picked up a brochure of Cyprus and Greece so that my mum and Rich can go on holiday! (As much as I would love to go, I won’t. Because, it won’t be a proper break from my mum because she would still be doing my care and for some reason whenever I go abroad I’m ill or something plays up so it’s not fair on them both.) I’ll save up some social hours and book a three day break in Devon or Cornwall.

I Emptied my catheter and then we got on the bus home and it was much quieter. Our driver gave us a free ride again and this time we stopped at the library and did the short walk home.

Keria even stayed when she knows I can’t reach the intercom button to let the other girls in to make sure they get through the door. The next thing I know I’m being hoisted up into bed. Am I tired? Yes. Did I have a lovely afternoon? Of course I did and I think I found a friend for life with Keira. As I write I am in bed now in my pyjamas, in light pyjamas I might add and have a close my window? Of course I haven’t it’s nice to get the breeze (sunshine can be very addictive) and haven’t even shut my curtains!

I then got my 3:30 girls to tidy up my room a little, and folded away some pyjamas and putting my winter blanket back into our porch as I won’t be needing it for awhile!

I’ve challenged myself to try and do all four of the social calls this week and tomorrow I plan on having a little picnic by the miners memorial where there is benches and lovely flowers. It’ll give me a chance to fill up my new flask I bought today and testing whether it can hold hot tea without leaking.

Now it’s time to read my magazines and take some painkillers. You may think that all sounds easy but when you’ve had a voice in your head that telling you that you can’t go out because the pain will start it’s hard. But today I proved that was utter bullshit and I am one happy little lady that I managed to live a day and not think about the pain all day